Midnight of July 12, 2014. After the celebration of Pharmacy Acquaintance party. She went back. Again. Love pa daw niya ako. Nagwait siya sa gate. Supposedly, I promised not to go downstairs and talk. Pero it’s really hard for me to hold grudges to anyone especially to whom you have spent your one of your best memories with. So hindi ko nanaman siya natiis that’s why nagbaba ako and let her come in. I was really angry that I want to punch, kick, slap and everything. But I acted professional. We talked in our room. Love niya pa daw ko. And deep inside me i know love ko parin siya pero grabe din kasi yung ginawa niya sa akin. Parang hindi tao ang pagtreat niya sakn na it feels na walang akong emotions na makafeel ng hurt. For me i think nagpakatanga nanaman ako. Sila pa that time pero nag-agree ako. Tanga na sa lahat ng tanga. I told her that I regretted everything that happened between the two us. I wished I never met her or even spent my time with her. I just realized in that 2 weeks that I lost my friends, my family’s expectations and my faith. Especially my faith. It was indeed a very big issue for me. A lot of people have big expectations towards me. I felt I betrayed them as well. But promise I never expected that I will be involved to her. We spent great and happy memories together.
She begged again. But I needed time to think. Hindi din kasi basta basta yung ginawa niya. Kahit sino din magka-50:50 pa. Honestly namiss ko siya. Promise. Super. The time na nakita ko siya gusto ko siya i-hug at the same time. Pero nagaconquer kasi sa sel ko ang anger. Pinagsisihan niya daw lahat lhat ng nagawa niya. Siyempre hindi ako nagbelieve. Sino ba naman ang magbelieve diba? That’s why sinakyanan ko lang lahat ng mga sinasabi niya that night. When she demanded a cuddle, I insisted t first kasi nga galit ako. Pero actually pinilit ko lang ang self ko na i-cuddle siya kasi pinagbigyan ko lang siya. We talked for hoursssss. Until we fell asleep together. Morning has come and she needs to go because my family will be coming here. So I let her go and told her that we will forget what happened last night and pretend that nothing happened. And again we will be back to strangers. She agreed and I felt glad for that.